The Lone Ranger... And Toto too!

 

                “Silver bullets, a masked man, Indians, villains! Who could it be? It’s the Lone Ranger! Dat-da-da-da! With a cloud of dust and a hearty “Hi ho, Silver!” the Lone Ranger and his Indian friend, Toto-“

                “No, no, no, Sarah. It’s Tonto, not Toto.” interrupted Nick.

                “Oh, I thought it was Toto.” said Sarah.

                The small acting group consisted of Nick, who played all the bad guys and supplied the props and costumes; Sarah, who was Tonto and the voice of the announcer, and finally, the star actor, Alex. Alex played the Lone Ranger and was the owner of the old episodes that inspired the three sibling’s theatrical career. For about fifteen minutes now they had been trying to get through the beginning of the show. Unfortunately, problems with scripting, costuming, and spacing kept cropping up. Sarah kept unintentionally messing up her “lines,” Alex was getting upset because he hadn’t been able to use his gun yet, and Mom was ready to banish them from the living room.

                “Let’s try it again.” Nick said. Sarah took a deep breath and tried again.

                “Silver bullets, a masked man, Indians, villains! Who could it be? It’s the Lone Ranger! With a cloud of dust and a hearty “Hi ho, Silver!” the Lone Ranger and his Indian friend, Toto-“ Nick shook his head in surrender. He knew she would never get it right. “-begin to look for bad guys. The chase is on! The Lone Ranger is on the look-out for any trouble and Toto is by his side. Suddenly, they spot a shady looking character in the shadows.”

                Alex excitedly bounced onto “the stage.” In reality it was just the living room but he didn’t care. To him it was the Wild West, filled with criminals and tumble weeds. He spoke his line in a deep, cowboy voice.

                “What’s that, Toto? Do you see him?” he asked Sarah, who had switched into her Indian costume.

                “Yes, Kemo Sabe. Me see man, look like trouble. Hey Nick?” she said, suddenly coming out of character. “What does Kemo Sabe mean?”

                “Oh boy. I don’t know. Dad?” Nick yelled. “What does Kemo Sabe mean?”

                “I think it means dumb cowboy in Indian.” Replied Dad nonchalantly from behind his newspaper.

                “There you go, Sarah. Oh, and by the way, Toto- I mean Tonto’s costume does not consist of a coonskin cap, a lei, and a pair of plastic red sunglasses with the lenses popped out.” Sarah looked down and surveyed her costume.

                “But I like it.”

                “Alright, whatever. Let’s get back to the script and can we please stick to it?” Nick said.

                “Nick, can I use my gun yet?” Alex asked.

                “No, not yet. Just wait. Go ahead.” Alex began where they left off.

                “I think I’ll go check this out. You stay here, Toto.” Alex proceeded toward the kitchen as Sarah took off her Tonto costume and put a hairbrush microphone to her mouth.

                “The Lone Ranger down the mountain to where the mysterious man had been standing. He sees something! He-“ Sarah’s narrative was suddenly cut off by Alex’s sound effects.

                “Bang! Bang-bang! Hahaha! I got you, you evil bad guy!”

                “No, Alex! Not yet!” came Nick’s voice from behind his bandana. Alex began to chase his older brother around the room at gunpoint. Anxious to escape Nick ran into the hall, around the corner and was just about to make his getaway when he smacked into the kitchen cabinet door.

                “Why is this cabinet open?” Nick asked as he tried to stay away from Alex and rub his head at the same time.

                “I had to get something out of it.” Mom answered. “You can close it now.” Still trying to evade Alex, Nick hide behind the door but he was spotted right away by Alex.

                “Put your hands up!” Alex told Nick.

                “That’s right. Put your hands up and into the sink. It’s time to wash up for dinner.” said Mom, bringing their episode to an abrupt end. Nick sighed with relief. He had gotten away from the plastic gun this time.

                “Stick ‘em up!” commanded a voice from behind him and he felt something poking him in the back.

                “Sarah, cut it out!” he protested. Sarah just giggled and pushed him into the dining room at “gunpoint.”

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Sarah and the Silly Putty

                “Libby!” said a hushed whisper. Libby rolled over and groaned.

“Libby!” This time the whisper was harsher. “Wake up!” Still Libby tried to ignore whoever was whispering. “Wake up, wake up, wake up!” Libby could not ignore the shaking that accompanied this plea to wake up and she rolled over to see her older brother standing over her.

“Why should I wake up? Mom isn’t even up yet.” mumbled Libby as she pulled the pink covers over her head. Nick was aware of the fact that Libby was not a morning person, but he was in desperate need of assistance.

“I need a pair of scissors.” At this Libby ripped the covers off her head and stared at Nick in confusion and slight indignation.

“What in the world do you need a pair of scissors for this early in the morning?”

“Sarah woke up and came into my room since she knows not to wake you up in the morning.” Nick sighed.

“So? She usually wakes you up in the morning.” She replied grumpily.

“I’m not finished yet. I put on an episode of Adventures in Odyssey, thinking she would listen to it with me and –“

“You thought Sarah, our Sarah, was going to sit quietly for half an hour and listen to a radio show? Sarah, who won’t take any naps and never sits still? Ever?”  

“Hey, I was listening to it. I thought she would like it.”

“Nick, she’s two and a half!”

“Anyway, I was listening to the show when I turned around to look at Sarah. You see, she had been really quiet for a while and you know that usually means trouble.” A sense of dread began to grow in Libby.

“Oh, no. What did she do this time?”

“Well, um, Sarah? Could you come here?” The sounds of little footsteps came from Nick’s room and Sarah’s round, chubby cheeks peeked around the doorway. Her hair, as usual, was in a static cloud around her head but she had a strange form of adornment just above her right eye. A huge glob of bright green goo was stuck in her wispy brown hair.

“Oh, Sarah, what is in your hair?” Libby asked in disbelief.

“Silly putty.” She said in her impish way. She looked at her older sister, who was now thoroughly awake, and smiled.

“How did you get it there? Nick, how did this happen?”

“I’m not really sure. Sarah?” Sarah just raised her hands a shrugged.

“It was an accident.” She said simply.

“How are we going to get it out?” Libby asked.

“That’s what I need scissors for. I’m going to cut it out of her hair.” Nick said in his matter of fact way.

“I don’t have any scissors. If you really want some you’ll have to go downstairs. I’ll go get Mom and tell her what happened.” said Libby.

“No! Don’t wake her up. She’s still sleeping.” Nick protested.

“We have to tell her what happened, Nick. We can’t just cut off a chunk of Sarah’s hair and expect Mom not to notice. Besides, she can cut hair a lot better than I can though I can undoubtedly cut hair better than you can.”

“Hey!” Nick said hotly.

“Well, it’s true.” She said as she got out of bed. “Sarah, you stay here and don’t get any of the dress up clothes stuck to the silly putty you have stuck in your hair. Nick, you go get the scissors and I’ll go get Mom.” Libby instructed.

“You don’t have to be so bossy about it.” Nick complained as he went in search of scissors. Libby helped Sarah get a cowboy hat off the top shelf and then went to go get her mother. However, the noise Nick made going down the stairs had woken up Mom and she met Libby in the doorway of her bedroom.

“What’s going on? Nick sounded like an elephant going down the stairs.” Mom suddenly caught sight of her youngest daughter. Standing there with a full cowboy costume over top of her pajamas, her rosy face was accented by that large glob of silly putty in her hair. Seeing the look on her mother’s face, Libby attempted to smooth over the incident.

“Don’t worry, Mom, we’ll take care of it. Nick just went to get a pair of scissors; we’ll just cut it out.”

“Cut it out? It’s right in front of her face. I have enough trouble trying to tame her hair as it is; an uneven haircut is not going to help.” Mom sighed and rubbed her eyes. There was never a dull moment and to prove this fact, Alex started crying the moment Nick came up the stairs.

“Got the scissors! Oh, hi Mom.”

“Nick, you can’t just cut off Sarah’s hair. Would you like your sister to walk around with a bald spot?”

“Uh, no. I guess not.” Nick said. “So, what do we do?” Mom sighed and went to go get Alex.

“First of all, tell me how Sarah wound up with silly putty in her hair.”  She listened patiently as her two oldest told her what happened. “Only you, Sarah. Out of all the kids, only you would wind up with neon green, glow-in-the-dark, silly putty in your hair.”

“Sorry.” Said Sarah, as she looked at her family and smiled mischievously.

“I’m sure how we are going to get this out of your hair.” Mom sighed.

“Could we brush it out?” Libby asked.

“I think that would be painful for Sarah. Besides, I can’t get her to sit still long enough to brush her hair normally, I’m not sure we could strap her down long enough to get silly putty out of it.” Said Mom.

“I heard mustard will get gum out.” Nick suggested.

“I think that was mayonnaise, Nick.” Libby said.

“I suppose we should look it up.” Mom said. “Everyone, go get dressed. Except you, Sarah. We might as well wait until we get that out of your hair.”  A few minutes later all four kids where crowded around Mom as she searched the web.

“The Crayola website says that peanut butter will work, or this other website says to try baby oil. I guess we try both and see what happens.” Said Mom. She turned to look at Sarah. “Let’s do this in the kitchen. Libby, get the peanut butter.” Nick hoisted Sarah into a chair as Libby grabbed the peanut butter and brought it to her mother.

“Do you just smear it in?” asked Libby, her nosed wrinkled.

“I guess so. Here goes.” said Mom. She took a spoonful of peanut butter and started spreading on Sarah’s hair.

                “Ewwww.” Libby commented.

                “Libby, that doesn’t help.” Mom said. “Sarah, please stop wiggling. You are making this very difficult.” Sarah was trying to see what was happening on top of her head. Anyone who has ever tried this knows that it is very hard to do. However, Sarah was determined to do it.

                “Hey! If she ever gets hungry, she could just eat her hair!” Nick said.

                “Ewwwwww, gross! “ Libby replied, completely disgusted.

                “Alright! That’s enough. Nick, go feed the dog. Libby, keep Alex occupied. Sarah,” Mom looked at Sarah, who was again smiling impishly. “Sarah, just sit still!” The kids saw that they were unintentionally pushing Mom toward the edge and they quickly obeyed her. Even Sarah stopped fidgeting. Left in peace, Mom worked on Sarah’s hair for about half an hour before all the green gunk was removed from her hair.

                “There. Now go play and stay out of trouble!”

                “Yes, Mom.” Sarah replied, angelically.

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